I’m sure you’re familiar with a savings account. You start a savings account by making a deposit. If you continue to make deposits, then your savings account grows. If you only make one deposit, then your savings account doesn’t grow. Apply that concept to your relationship. This doesn’t mean keeping score. It means working toward building a positive perspective in your relationship. Building these emotional deposits with your partner is exactly what most men are looking for when asked what they want more from their girlfriends / wives / romantic interests. RELATED: 10 Things Men Secretly Want In A Wife
The 10 things men want their partners to do to build a stronger relationship:
1. Listen to the little things
There are only a couple of minutes in a relationship where you build trust and learn how to keep it. For example, you come home after a long day at work and your partner wants to talk to you about the children. You can simply say, “I’m tired” and walk away — or you can stay and listen to your partner. This may not make a huge difference at the time but in the long run, it will. RELATED: Guys Explain What Men Really Want In A Relationship
2. Make an effort to be positive
The small things can make a big difference. Your partner will notice. And, contribute with a smile. Remember, it’s not always what you say — it’s how you say it that really matters.
3. Don’t criticize
Learn to have a discussion about your problems. This also means don’t get defensive. Learn to accept responsibility for your behavior and control your defensive behavior. RELATED: 5 Lies You’ve Been Told About What Men Really Want
4. Tell him how much you love and appreciate him
Regardless of your love language, we all need to hear this. No one ever gets sick of someone telling them they love them or how much they appreciate them. The more specific you can be the better.
5. Take care of yourself
This means getting plenty of rest, making good food choices and exercising regularly. Take breaks during the day and don’t be too hard on yourself with your internal voice. It’s true we need to take care of ourselves before we can take care of others. RELATED: 3 Weird Things That Make Men Fall In Love (And Stay In Love)
6. Develop empathy
Don’t just listen to your partner, listen to your partner with empathy when they share a stressful event that happened at work. Your partner will feel like you really care about them.
7. Accept influence from your partner
Try out your partner’s ideas with enthusiasm. This is really good for your relationship. It also keeps the relationship on equal ground. This is very important in a relationship. RELATED: 27 Men Describe The #1 Thing A Woman Did That Made Them Fall Deeply In Love
8. Manage your phone time
The next time you have dinner together, leave the phone and mobile gadgets behind. Spend time talking to one another. Ask questions and take a genuine interest in what your partner has to say. Mobile technology will always be there. You can go to it at another time.
9. Be willing to work on your relationship
All relationships go through highs and lows. This is to be expected. Try and work things out. Don’t jump to conclusions. It’s alright to agree to disagree. RELATED: 3 Magic Words That Keep The Best Couples Together Forever
10. Support his dreams
It’s easy to forget about your dreams when you are in a relationship. Work, the house and the children tend to take over. Tell your partner what your dreams are. Maybe, you want to take a night class or travel to an exotic place. Your dreams don’t have to be the same, but you do need to be supportive of them. Just as it’s never too late to deposit into your savings account, it’s never too late to deposit into your emotional bank account. So, start today. This will help rebuild the friendship, which is the foundation of your relationship. RELATED: The Secret Thing Men Want More Than Love (And How To Give It To Them) Lianne Avila is a Marriage & Family Therapist helping couples who are looking to rebuild a close emotional connection and get their relationships back on track.